The Square Ring

From Tomorrow’s Pattaya Mail

by Howie Reed

TSR is a great believer in the theory that boxers improve their skills first in the gym then hone them with meaningful opposition in the ring. Today’s heavyweights and 99% of all Thai boxers do neither. Heavyweights neglect to do this because they’re flat lazy in the gym and can make big bucks by fighting ‘tomato cans.’ With Thai fighters once they get to a certain level they stop all progress. That’s the way it is.

Undisputed cruiserweight David Haye may be ready to break the mold though. He’s made the decision to move up to heavyweight and chase the big money and also to broaden his opportunity to improve. There’s a history of cruiserweights moving up with some success: Michael Moorer and Evandler Holyfield to name but two.

Most UK heavyweights stay home, fight the ‘usual suspects’ and never become complete fighters.

To ensure he gets the opportunity to fight in places where the competition is, Haye recently took a giant step. He signed with Golden Boy Promotions for fights in the USA. Until he moves to the USA however, Haye’s next four fights will be in the UK, probably at the O2 Arena and all the fights will be carried on Setanta TV.

“My ultimate ambition is to become the heavyweight champion, a two-weight world champion and to go out there and clean up the heavyweight division,” Haye told Setanta. “The heavyweight championship is held by a guy called Wladimir Klitschko. He’s universally recognized as the number one fighter, so that’s the guy I have to go after. I’m willing to fight the best out there to get to the main man. I’m going to knock him out live on Setanta Sports.”
Let’s see if Haye can now walk the walk.

Mayweather Retires (Again)

It’s hard to take seriously a boxer that retires from the ring when he’s still winning and on top. It becomes especially difficult when he states that, “money doesn’t matter.” Ever notice that’s it’s always people with money that make this stupid statement?

That’s exactly what 5-time world champion Floyd Mayweather jr. did last week. He made the announcement in a letter to the press that was released by ‘one of his peeps.’ The contents of the letter won’t be reprinted here as it’s filled with enough ‘sugar’ to put any reader into a diabetic coma. The immediate effect though is to put the kybosh on Mayweather’s September 20 rematch with Oscar De La Hoya - although it’s only June so ‘Pretty Boy’ could ‘un-retire’ again!
It’s just a guess but the general sports public probably greeted the news with a yawn and a “so what?” Mayweather never was popular with sports fan, had no fan base and depended upon his opponents to sell tickets. Ricky Hatton being the latest.

The boxing press, as one could predict, greeted the news with the solemnity reserved for the announcement that they might actually have to pay for something. The gnashing of teeth with the obligatory hand wringing with the down turned eyes was the order of day in the boxing community. The actual effect of Mayweather jr. retiring this time on the sporting public, with the exception of the cancelled fight with De La Hoya, is about the same as a tetsi fly climbing an elephant’s rear with romance on his mind.

The fact is that Mayweather’s exit may be a blessing in disguise for boxing fans. There can be little argument but that a Ricky Hatton-Paulie Malignaggi fight is of little interest to anyone that doesn’t known all the words to “There’s Only One Ricky Hatton.” How about Ricky Hatton-Oscar De La Hoya outdoors this September in Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Wembley, or how about Yankee Stadium in New York? Will it happen? No way Jose.’ Makes too much sense.

Promoters - Gotta Luv ‘em

Two of the primary requirements for any boxing promoter are no sense of guilt or responsibility and a really short memory. The great promoters would also be ‘bumfuddled” to explain the meaning of the word ‘shame.’

The UK’s Frank Warren is one of the very best promoters simply because he has all the elements necessary. He also never misses the opportunity to make a headline. Warren made a $1.2 million dollar offer for David Haye to defend his relinquished cruiserweight title against Matt Skelton.
“The timing of the offer was priceless,” said Haye. “As Hayemaker Promotions (Haye’s company) are announcing their ethos and plans to break trends in boxing - to put on exciting, competitive and meaningful contests – Frank Warren’s Sports Network offer me a fight with a washed-up 40-year old coming off a defeat with nowhere else to go. I’m sure I’m not the only one who saw the irony in that. That aside, the offer was a derisory one anyway. We thank him for the offer.”

Of his next fight Haye says, “It will be an exciting fight against a dangerous, top 10-ranked heavyweight. Taking that into account, if you’ve seen Matt Skelton fight, you’ll know it won’t be him.”

How many times have you heard a boxer use the words “ethos” and “derisory”?

Writers Goofy Also

“Your Lordship makes fun of promoters but as a group you boxing writers aren’t a lot better. One of the favorites of TSR is Japan’s Joe Koizumi who doubles as a writer and promoter. He filed a story recently that announced to a waiting world that, ‘We now have no less than seven world champions here in Japan.’ That’s the cat’s pajamas your Lordship. He then travels into the land of Dah with ‘Their (the boxer’s) promoters have been struggling to get TV dates before or after the Olympic Games in China.’

“Why struggle? Unless my fine English public education isn’t working, boxers everywhere are struggling to get TV dates. Of course they’re either before or after the Olympics in China. Couldn’t be any other way, could they?

“The Governor of the Pattaya Mail sports page sometimes has to admonish the Lord of the Manor because he writes sentences that never end. He just prattles on until he decides it’s time to insert a period. Kurt Wolfheimer, writer for Fightnews.com., published the following sentence: ‘41-year-old former heavyweight champion Bruce ‘The Atlantic City Express’ Seldon (38-6, 34 KOs) had to overcome a bad cut over his left eye in his comeback for one last shot at a world title in scoring a fifth round stoppage of Ecuadorian Livin Castillo (14-5, 9 KOs) at the House of Blues in the Showboat Hotel and Casino on a five-bout card promoted by Rising Star Promotions on Saturday night in Atlantic City, New Jersey.’

“Now that’s a sentence.”

The Jeevers Report

“The Lord of the Manor went 50-50 in fight predictions last week, which is about what any ‘rookie’ could do. Where he really stubbed his toe was when ‘super star in the making’ Juan Manuel Lopez, now 22-0, destroyed Daniel Ponce De Leon almost before the deep tones of announcer Michael Buffer had died down.

“Nicknamed ‘Juanma’, which the uneducated might pronounce ‘Yo Mamma’, Lopez started slow for the first minute of round one. The next minute and 25 seconds of the fight were pure hell for De Leon. He went down once, getting up at 9 but still in bad shape. The second knockdown caused referee Michael Ortega to stop it at 2:25.

“While Lopez-De Leon was spectacular, a majority of the fans that packed the Boardwalk Auditorium in Atlantic City came to watch Kelly Pavlik put on a show. They weren’t disappointed as Palvik dropped ‘The Rocket’ Lockett twice in the second and a final time in the third. Trainer Ezno Calzaghe tossed in the towel.

“Pavlik, now at 34-0 was dominating, powerful and scoring at will with both hands. Prior to the fight Lockett said, ‘I’m prepared to go 12 rounds. I just predict a W. I have a great chance of winning.’ As your Lordship noted, Lockett was brought in to make Pavlik look good. He did the job.

“Next for Pavlik? According to promoter Bob ‘Today I’m telling the Truth’ Arum, it looks like an October 20 match up with ‘Joltin Joe’ (maybe). The Lord of the Manor says ‘Pavlik will walk thru Calzaghe like a Teelock does through Baht.’”

Youth Will Be Served

Sergio Mora (21-0-1) had it and former three-time champion Vernon Forrest (40-3) didn’t. In their title WBC super welterweight bout on Sunday morning from the Mohegan Sun Casino, Forrest started like a “house a fire”. The problem was that the fire wasn’t a blaze but a small spark. The fire was extinguished by Mora and age following round 3. They were two factors that couldn’t be overcome by experience, guile or desire.

Thailand’s “super judge” Anek Hongtongkan gave Mora 8 of the last nine rounds on his way to scoring with the majority 116-112. Judge John McKaie had it 115-113 while Gayle Van Hoy had it 114 all, so one has to wonder what fight he was watching.

The first time they fought for the WBO welter title, Carlos Quintana surprised the heck out of an undefeated Paul Williams with a unanimous decision victory. Paul Williams calls himself “The Punisher,” a name that fitted well him on Sunday. He unleashed a plethora of punches with amazing alacrity early in the first round that caught Quintana by surprise. At the end of the flurry he placed a period and the exclamation mark with a left hook that sent Quintana to the canvas. Quintana got up wobbly and not having the slightest idea what all the fuss was about. Another “barrage of punches” ensued that ended with the obligatory left hook. Quintana got up again but referee Eddie Claudio wisely stopped the carnage at the 2:15 mark of the first stanza.

Here’s Jeeves (again)

“Gov, your pals from the Island Lager Bar and the Yorkshire Inn in Patong have a big time WBC championship fight on tap next Wednesday at the Phuket Boxing Arena. Oledong Sithsamerchai (26-0) defends his straw-weight crown against Japanese invader Junichai Edisouka whose 17-10 record would indicate that he may be a victim of a Thai ‘Tsunami’. No problem if it goes the 12 rounds because your pal from Las Vegas, Tony Castellano, will be one of the judges.

“When Shane Mosley defeated Oscar De La Hoya back in September of 2003 rumors of Mosley’s use of performance-enhancing drugs swirled around. Those rumors now can be confirmed with the filing of court papers in the case against convicted steroids dealer Victor Conte. Mosley’s trainer Derryl Hidson and Conte both say they saw Mosley take the drug EOP weeks before the De La Hoya fight.

“Your Lordship, as I prepare your refreshments of a fine lager, a moderately large cigar and musical entertainment fit for a king, I would like to relay to you some inspirational thoughts from John ‘The Space Man’ from Northern California: ‘Build a man a fire, and he’ll be warm for an evening. Set a man on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.’”